TRUST
Trust is a very impt factor for all
relationships.When trust is broken,it
is the end of the relationship.Lack of
trust leads to suspicion,suspicion
generates anger,anger causes enmity &
enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that 1 day
she received a phone call.She
answered,"Public Utilities Board."
There was silence.She repeated, "PUB."
There was still no answer When she was
going to cut off the line she Heard
a lady's voice, "Oh so this is PUB.
Sorry, I got the number from my
Husband's pocket but I do not know
whose number it is."

W/o mutual trust,just imagine what will
happen to the couple if the telephone
operator answered with just "hello"
instead of "PUB".

NO FINGERS POINTING
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many
ppl praised u for a successful
marriage. Could u pls share with me ur
secret?"The father-in-law answered in a
smile,"Never criticize ur wife for her
shortcomings or when she does smth
wrong. Always bear in mind that becos
of her shortcomings & weaknesses,she
cld not find a better husband than u."

We all look 4ward to being loved &
respected.Many ppl are afraid of
losing face.Generally,when a person
makes a mistake,he wld look ard to find
a scapegoat to point the finger at.This
is the start of a war.We shld always
rmbr that when we point 1 finger at a
person,the other 4 fingers are pointing
at ourselves.

If we 4give the others, others will
ignore our mistake too.

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS
A person visited the govt matchmaker
for marriage,SDU,& requested "I am
looking for a spouse.Pls help me to
find a suitable 1."The SDU officer
said,"Ur requirements,pls."Oh,good
looking,polite,humorous,sporty,knowledgeable,

good in singing & dancing. Willing
to accompany me the whole day at home
during my leisure hour,if I don't go
out.Telling me interesting stories when
I need companion for conversation & be
silent when I want to rest."The officer
listened carefully & replied,"I
understand u need a television."

There is a saying that a perfect match
can only be found btw a blind wife & a
deaf husband,becos the blind wife
cannot see the faults of the husband &
the deaf husband cannot hear the
nagging of the wife.Many couples are
blind & deaf at the courting stage &
dream of perpetual perfect relationship.
Unfortunately,when the excitement of
love wears off,they wake up & discover
that marriage is not a bed of roses.
The nightmare begins.

NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail becos 1 party
tries to overpower another,or demands
too much.Ppl in love tend to think that
love will conquer all & their spouses
will change the bad habits aft
marriage. Actually,this is not the
case. There is a Chinese saying which
carries the meaning that "It is easier
to reshape a mountain or a river than a
person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus,having
high expectation on changing the spouse
character will cause disappointment and
unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change
ourselves & lower our expectations



RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries
the meaning that "A speech will either
prosper or ruin a nation." Many
relationships break off because of
wrong speech. When a couple is too
close with each other, we always forget
mutual respect & courtesy. We may say
anythg w/o considering if it would hurt
the other party.

A friend & her millionaire husband
visited their construction site. A
worker who wore a helmet saw her &
shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We
used to date in secondary school." On
the way home, her millionaire
husband teased her, "Luckily u married
me. Otherwise u will be the wife
of a construction worker." She
answered ,"U should appreciate that u
married me. Otherwise, he will be the
millionaire and not u."

Frequently exchanging these remarks
plants the seed for a bad relationship.
It's like a broken egg - cannot be
reversed.

PERSONAL PERCEPTION

Different people have different
perception. One man's meat could be
another man's poison. A couple bought a
donkey from the market. On the way
home, a boy commented, "Very stupid.
Why neither of them ride on the
donkey?" Upon hearing that, the husband
let the wife ride on the donkey. He
walked besides them. Later, an old man
saw it and commented, "The husband is
the head of family. How can the wife
ride on the donkey while the husband is
on foot?" Hearing this, the wife
quickly got down and let the husband
ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an
old Lady. She commented, "How can the
man ride on the donkey but let the wife
walk. He is no gentleman." The husband
thus quickly asked the wife to join him
on the donkey. Then, they met a young
man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how
can u hold up the weight of 2 persons.
They are cruel to u." Hearing that, the
husband & wife immediately climbed down
from the donkey and carried it on their
shoulders.

It seems to be the only choice left.
Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey
was frightened & struggled. They lost
their balance & fell into the river. U
can never have everyone praise u, nor
will everyone condemn u. Never in the
past, not at present, & never will be
in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others
words if our conscience is clear...

BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in
the States. A man came out of his
home to admire his new truck. To his
puzzlement, his 3-year-old son was
happily hammering dents into the shiny
paint of the truck. The man ran to
his son, knocked him away, hammered the
little boy's hands into pulp as
punishment. When the father calmed
down, he rushed his son to the
hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately
to save the crushed bones, he finally
had to amputate the fingers from both
the boy's hands. When the boy woke up
from the surgery & saw his bandaged
stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm
sorry about your truck." Then he
asked, "but when are my fingers going
to grow back?" The father went home &
committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time
someone steps on ur feet or u wish to
take revenge. Think first before u lose
your patience with someone u love.
Trucks can be repaired. Broken bones &
hurt feelings often can't. Too often
we fail to recognize the difference
between the person and the performance.
We forget that forgiveness is greater
than revenge.

People make mistakes.We are allowed to
make mistakes.But the actions we
take while in a rage will haunt us
forever......